Bonus Carols: Deck the Halls, Jingle Bells, O Sanctissima

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Deck the Halls

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Deck the halls with bonus money,

Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.

Land of gold and milk and honey,

Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.

Spend away in merry measure,

Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.

Boy, we love this Yuletide treasure,

Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la!

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Thank you, Judge Reece, for our money,

Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.

Petro and Montgomery

Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.

OEA guys helped us, also

Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.

ORTA must remember, too,

Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.

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Jingle Bells

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Bonuses, bonuses

Bonus all the way;

Oh what fun it is to spend,

Every single day!

Bonuses, bonuses,

Making our hearts gay;

Oh what fun it is to spend

Retirees’ funds away, Hey!

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O Sanctissima

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Oh, sweet bonuses,

Sweet, sweet bonuses,

Come and make me rich today;

While retirees suffer

Making ends meet, never;

What do we care,

Why should we care

How they fare?

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O sweet bonuses,

Sweet, sweet bonuses,

You are all we work here for;

We show up every day,

Do our job and get our pay;

Then we get our bonuses

So we can play.

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O sweet bonuses,

Sweet, sweet bonuses,

Never have to work for you.

Double dipping is our name,

*Work* for extras not our game,

Just for showing up each day

Is all we do.

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O sweet bonuses,

Sweet, sweet bonuses,

Screw retirees left and right;

They can’t pay health care,

Soon they’ll be on Welfare,

While we spend our bonus money

We don’t care.

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O sweet bonuses,

Sweet, sweet bonuses,

Some are many times the amount

That some retirees

Get in a whole year

What do we care,

Why should we care

What they do?

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O sweet bonuses,

Sweet, sweet bonuses,

We are greedy, but we don’t care.

Isn’t it our money

To spend as we see fit?

We don’t care

Where it comes from

Or who hurts.

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O sweet bonuses,

Sweet, sweet bonuses,

Sold our souls to make you ours;

Gave up all our honor

And our integrity

Just to woo you

And possess you

Evermore.