BONUS CAROLS: White Christmas, O Christmas Tree I, O Christmas Tree II, Thine is the Glory

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White Christmas

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I’m dreaming of a sweet bonus

Just like the ones I used to know;

Where the dollar signs glisten,

And retirees listen

To our pockets jingling with their dough;

I’m dreaming of a sweet bonus;

With every Grinchmas card I write:

“May your days be merry and bright,

And may all my bonus checks you write!”

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O Christmas Tree I

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O bonus check, sweet bonus check,

Your loveliness delights me;

O bonus check, fat bonus check,

Your loveliness delights me.

I do my job, but nothing more,

For bonus checks, which I adore;

O bonus check, sweet bonus check,

Your loveliness delights me.

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O bonus check, sweet bonus check,

Your loveliness delights me;

O bonus check, fat bonus check,

Your loveliness delights me.

Retirees scream but I don’t care;

They’re sick and poor, and on Welfare;

O bonus check, sweet bonus check,

Your loveliness delights me.

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O bonus check, sweet bonus check,

Your loveliness delights me;

O bonus check, fat bonus check,

Your loveliness delights me.

That pot of gold is there for me;

And yet they say that I’m greedy!

O bonus check, sweet bonus check,

Your loveliness delights me.

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O Christmas Tree II

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Integrity, integrity,

It's incorruptibility;

Integrity, integrity,

It's in the dictionary.

The sculpture's twisted, wonder why;

The old Board prob'ly made it fry.

Integrity, integrity,

It's incorruptibility.

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Integrity, integrity,

It's firm adherence to a code.

If Bob Brown knew, and Conni, too,

We'd ask them not to hit the road.

When Dennis speaks, they shut him down

And scowl with that familiar frown;

Integrity, integrity,

It's incorruptibility.

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O Bobby Brown, and Conni, too

Please read the dictionary;

Integrity is still in there,

And yet to the contrary

You'll also find "roadblock" in there

Your favorite tactic, that's for sure;

Integrity, integrity,

It's incorruptibility.

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O, do look up "vendetta," too

Oh, how you glow with this one!

Ignore the issues, get your due

From Dennis, John and CORE folks

You bring the old Grinch to the Board

Your grudges can almost be heard

Integrity, integrity,

It's incorruptibility.

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Thine is the Glory

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Thine is the Glory,

Bonus checks galore;

When you fill our little pockets,

We’ll come back for more.

If we think you’re holding back on us,

Punishment we’ll deal;

We will take a trillion dollars;

You’ll miss your next meal!

Thine is the Glory,

Bonus checks galore;

When you fill our little pockets,

WE'LL BE BACK FOR MORE!!